Araw ng Pagkilala (KAPP: April 21, 2007,UP Theater)

Hindi man ako nakaakyat ng stage para kunin ang diploma ko, ayos na sakin na makita ang mga kaibigan ko na kunin ang mga diploma nila..maging proud at super saya habang tinatawag ang pangalan nila at kinakamayan ng dean at panauhing pandangal namin. Ang saya talaga pala ng feeling habang nandun sa loob ng theater dahil sa okasyong iyon: ang pagtatapos. Maraming salamat sa lahat ng magulang na bumati, mga kaibigan, kay june na nagbigay ng bulaklak at sa lahat ng taong kumuha ng pichur..nakakasilaw man at nakakangawit, ayuuus lang! By the way marami pang pichurs sa multiply ko so if interested, click lang sa gilid. :)

kulitan lang habang nasa labas pa sila




my sablay moment with eman the cum laude and pam the proud graduate

ang gaganda!

izay, me and june after the ceremony

ang napakakulit at uber cool na Department Chair ng Geography, Sir Meliton Juanico.

Pam, Kimi and Me sa stage. Lahat ng tao ay nagkakagulo na!

I really appreciate everything that they've done to me. JP here was hugging me while congratulating me because he (among others) said that it was also my day. :)

Congratulations guys!

Hanggang sa susunod na mga hakbang sa buhay.

The Graduation Slash Thank You Edition!

Graduaaaaaate na ko!!!!!

Hindi lang iisa ang dahilan kung bakit masayang-masaya ako na nakagraduate na nga ako (although hindi pa official). Una na siguro dun ang Finally. After n years of staying in UP (and-I- wouldn't-bother- explaining-why-it-took-me-that-long-but-if-you-want-to-i-could-tell-you-just -ask- me!) sa wakas naman ay makakasagot na ako, proudly, na "oo, graduate na ko". And I guess everybody dreamt of graduating right? I'm just one of them. Pangalawa, it only means that i am SOOO over math now. After my nth time of enlisting, sleepless nights, insane days you've caused me (and my other friends too!), praying, buying bluebooks, photocopying sample exams, cursing all my teachers and other horrible experiences, I'm so, so darn happy it all paid off even if it took me many times just to overcome you. Lastly, makakahanap na ko ng trabahong mas matino dahil may lisensya na ko for that another whole world out there. OR NOT!!!

Pero kasabay ng pagtatapos na ito nangangahulugan lamang na maraming taong dapat pasalamatan all throughout the years. Syempre hindi ko pa maibabalik sainyo ang lahat ng tulong na ibinigay nyo sakin sa ngayon pero someday, mangyayari din yun. Sa dami ng papasalamatan ko ay hindi ko na alam kung maaalala ko pa kayong lahat, kasi kahit mga taong hindi ko naman naging close talaga pero naging part kahit once ng college life ko ay kino-consider ko nang nakatulong sakin. Hayaan nyo someday ay mababayaran ko din lahat ng kabutihan ninyo!

Sa lahat ng nag-congratulate at super happy para sakin nung gabing nalaman ko na pumasa na ko sa math ko, maraming salamat sa pakikisama sa kasayahan ko. Super elated ako nun to the max: barbs, june, mon, leidz, kimi, pam, nj, em, hummy, anna, jas, mitch, izay, tita edna, tito rene, honey , jenna at mikki. Sa 2 taong kahit na hindi ko naman nasabihan pero apparently ay nakarating sa kanila ang balita: ed and glady. at sa nag-email para i-congratulate ako: jog. Maraming salamat sainyo guys!

Ang college life ko nga pala by the way ay hindi lamang resulta ng iisang tao bagkus ay collective effort ng maraming maraming taong nabulabog kong tumulong sakin over the years (nasabi ko na ata to in my previous entries). Although hindi ko alam kung san magsisimula, siguro sisimulan ko na lang sa:

*lola dearies ko
Lola Teddy at Lola Sarah. Syempre sila ang pinakaunang dahilan kung bakit nakapag-aral ako sa UP kahit ayaw ng iba kong mga kamag-anak . I'm sorry pero it was UP or nothing at all. Akalain mong determined na pala ko noon!

*We Are One
kayo ang unang pamilya ko sa UP. Grabe, kung ikekwento ko man yun, it should be a whole another story to tell. Ate Grace, Honey, Izay, Che-Che, Jog, Popsie at Rocky, ika nga ng Fall Out Boy Thanks for the Memories.

*Block N2 friends ko na sina Weng at Jan!

*UP Sorg orgmates and families ko especially batch dos mil!

* Sa lahat ng classmates ko nung high school na sobrang naging close ko nung nag-college kami, sobrang treasured yun.

*UP Explore orgmates and families! I Love UP Explore!

*Geography Department friends. Ang hirap i-categorize kasi mga naging kaibigan ko sa department ay naging orgmates ko at superfriends pa. pero nevertheless maraming salamat pam, kimi, juraine, ed, ela, sarah, mitch, jayvie, leriz, june, essie, jp, raymond, mona, eman, van, aileen, chantel,lady, dean.

*Aurora fieldmates. 2nd year anniv na natin mga tsong!

*Lahat ng maging teachers, professors, instructors ko then and now, whether pinasa nyo ko or not. Pero special thanks kina sir Mandigma, Ma'am Vallesteros, Sir Leyson, Sir Sonny Ortega, Ma'am Nantes, Ma'am Yany. At sa lahat ng mga tumanggap sakin nung nag-prerog ako sa mga klase nyo, grabe, salamat talaga.

*Kina Sered, Ma'am Abad, Mang Cris at Mang Rolly( sa pagtanggap sakin bilang SA for 2 years).

*Sa Bermillo family. Grabe supeeer talaga! For all the support: financially, emotionally and especially spiritually! Sobrang na-feel ko kung panong magkaron ng pamilya dahil sainyo. mahirap i-define kung gano ako nagpapasalamat sainyo sa lahat ng tulong na ibinigay nyo sakin pero maraming maraming salamat talaga.

*sa lahat ng mga naging groupmates ko. sa sobrang dami na nun ay hindi ko na rin kayo matandaan pero you also deserve to be thanked kasi pumasa ko sa subjet na yun kasi ka-group ko kayo. ahaha!

*sa lahat ng mga drivers ng jeep na pumayag na hindi ako magbayad at patawad naman dun sa lahat ng mga jeep na winantutri ko..:(


Maraming Maraming Salamat sainyong lahat kasi either kayo ay: tumulong sakin na magbayad ng tuition fees ko, nagpapakain sakin kapag wala akong pera (which is always!), nagpautang sakin pag wala na kong pera, nanlibre ng pamasahe, nagpakopya ng assignment, nakikinig sa mga laments ko sa math, thesis mates ko, nagbigay ng libreng bluebooks sakin, nagpahiram ng mga ballpen, mga nag-share-a-load at nagload sakin for free. madami pa pero hindi matatapos to kung iisa-isahin ko pa. So in short, nagpapasalamat ako sainyong lahat kasi naging patient kayo sa akin whether as a friend or classmate or orgmate, because of your unwavering support and belief na matatapos ko din ang lahat ng ito someday. at eto na nga yun!!

pero hindi pa dito nagtatapos ang lahat..panibagong simula lang sa isa pang mas masalimuot na mundo.

pero as of now, kampai lang muna ng kampai!!

Keeps Getting Better

Almost two years ago, this was us.
ca: february 14, 2005

Eto na kami ulet ngayon. Haha!
Presenting: We Are One Ladies

3 of my oldest friends in UP

it's not sane...*

hindi pa offiially tapos ang sem kong 'to. kelan ko kaya masasabi with all pride na natapos na ang 1st sem, 06-07 for me? hayy..Lord, ibalato Mo na po ang 183 samin! Waaahhh. St. Jude (ang bagong patron saint namin!), sana wag kayong magsasawa sa kakapakinig sa sirang plakang request namin. :)

since maraming kabiguan at ka-depression-an sa buhay ang mga tao (including me of course!), i'm really thankful na may mga kaibigan ako sa paligid ko na hindi nagsasawang magsabi ng words of encouragement kahit napaka-hopeless na talaga (hello! st. jude na nga e!). basta. although kagabi ay isang napakalungkot na araw sa buhay ng isang kaibigan, alam naman nyang andito lang naman kami sa tabi nya math 100 or how many takes pa man.makonsensya na ang dapat makonsensya pero talaga, sumira ka ng isang pangarap e!siguro hindi mo pa naransan ang umasa sa isang pangarap na gagradweyt dapat ngayong sem pero poof, it was gone in what? 30 seconds of your blabbering. oh well.

at hindi ko man yun dapat gabi, well, i don't know how to make a logic out of everything that's happening..Lord? are you making fun of my feelings (no pun intended)? wala lang. alam Mo namang matagal na kong nakipag-bargain sa'yo di ba? ipagpapalit ko ang lovelife at masayang pamilya kahit ilang dekada pa man ang hintayin ko maayos ko lang ang academic life ko. Kaya sana kung ano mang plan of action meron tayo dyan, kung meron man, uhmmmm...bahala na Kayo. You know better. Di ko lang talaga ma-figure out pa kung dapat ba kong maging masaya sa nangyari or what??! I'm confused. Basta, please, don't give me this feeling. a heart is such a delicate thing..kayang i-take ng utak ko ang mga rejections sa lahat na, wag na lang yung heart.masyado nang maraming band-aids at scars yan, give it a break. Amen.

*Pam..we'll see better days. promise yan.

the miles (or kilometres) you have to run for friendship

Since this happened last night (and i was still inspired to write then), i'll have to copy from my journal to retell (tama ba?) forthnight events. haha. so kumusta naman sa kadramahan?

september 21, 2006, 2:20 am
tonight was another round of usual "up there" moments. Although everyone knows that i don't drink i am an ever present member. Tonight's drama was one of a kind. I realized though that:

*being sane or the only alcohol-free person can be tiring too (para kang may mga anak na saksakan ng kukulit at the same time nag-iiyakan pa!haha). But if you are with your friends, it's somewhat rewarding in the sense that it is the only service you can do for them for bringing you there in the first place. And yes, being alcohol-free has a great compensation too!!!) :)

*honestly, ----'s revelation wasn't that shocking nor even new to me anymore. probably it's because of the fact na bago pa man ang lahat na ito, tinanggap ko na sa sarili ko ang possibility na maging sila ni crush in the future. Sobrang nakatulong yun at proud naman ako sa sarili k na malinawa na yun sakin. nad that's that. Although may booze na involved at that time, pero c'mon, di naman ako engot para balewalain yung comment na yun. Subconsciously, matagal na din nyang naiisip din siguro yun, di lang nya masabi sakin ng normal sya. Pero ayos lang naman talaga. :)

*sometimes, there are people whose beliefs you can disregard for a day (or short time only). Who knows we might have been interfering an age-old belief of theirs, whether for good or for bad. But we have to take into consideration that we can't rush somebody into anything that we want them to believe. It'll take time of course, and hope in vain that they'll realize it soon before its too late.

*true friends will embrace you for everything that you are no matter how much you fall short, whatever you lack and even if you're too full of yourself. We might not see the need of proclaiming our undying loyalty to our friends regularly but it helps from time to time to tell them, to let them know (or feel) how much we appreciate them, how good (or bad!) we've become because of them and how grateful we are knowing that a loving and steady arms will catch or break our every fall. In this world of superficiality, your friends don't want to hear of grand or elaborate stuff to make them feel good...sometimes, the "little things" matter much more than just our great intentions.



so para sa iyo, na inspirasyon ng lahat na ito, ituloy mo lang yan. at least mas matutuwa kami kung may makikita kaming pagbabago sa'yo. be consistent kahit gradual, sabi ko nga sayo sa text. hindi mo ikamamatay kung aminin mo sa sarili mo na all this time, you really care for us. :)

Hell Hath No Fury

never in my acadademic life (kahit na minsan ay towards mediocrity na ang performances ko) na umiyak ako dahil sa isang teacher. por dios y por santo. bakit ba hindi na lang nya sabihin ng harap-harapan samin na hindi pa sya nakagawa ng exam, hence, the reason for our super-delayed exam. hindi sa nagpapakatalino ko kaya atat na kong mag-exam..ayoko lang kasi na magkasabay sila ng exam ko sa math to think na pareho silang mahirap. pero wala, nagwagi pa rin ang evil sa mundong ito. after ng matagal na rebyuhan, matinong usapan (though sya hindi), nagwagi pa rin sya. fine. kung pwede lang i-drop tong subject na 'to pero hindi e.kahit na anong gawin ko e magkikita pa rin kami't magkikita.peste talaga. wala syang karapatan to make a living hell out of our college existence. sya ba nag-papaaral sakin? sya ba ang magbabayad ng tuition fee ko next sem in case na bumagsak ako?hindi naman e. kaya hindi sya masaya e.kaya maraming galit sa kanya e.sobrang nakakainis talaga.napahiya man ako sa klase ngayong araw pero alam kong not in vain. for the first time din ay nagrebelde ko sa prof sa pamamagitan ng hindi pagsagot. kung alam lang nyang nakaka-depress ang pinaggagagawa nya at hindi mababago ng pakiki-chummy nya sa mga estudyante nya especially to boys when he's a guy in the first place ang pagtingin namin sa kanya. pakshet talaga.

**
so parang ganun ang nagiging trend ng buhay ko ngayong week.medyo iyakan blues lang. wala lang.at least ang dahilan ng pag-iyak ko nung sabarday ay dahil naman sa tuwa. i felt so 'loved' and thankful to God that day na kahit kala ko e wala nang makakatulong sakin (on such a short notice) e nagprovide sya. yun ay isa sa mga moment na di mo na lang mapigilan na umiyak kahit di ka naman talaga naiiyak pero nung nasimulan mo na e antagal bago ka nahimasmasan. So anyway, i was saved by the bell. and the bell this time was popsie.

the story of the one who was left behind

This is not the first time that i admitted i have been missing an awful lot of actions lately. Well, blame it to the poor academic standing, SA work, family responsibilities and personal routines. I have been left way,way behind in all the news, worthy or not, i rarely see my friends/orgmates, i have been neglecting the readings screaming their lungs out for me to take a look at them and for the nth time, I flunked the M subject. Enough. It's another story to tell that I am not going to share in the near future.

OK. Back to the topic. And so in this way, what i really wanted to say is that even if most of the times I am the closest thing to being a holy ghost, kj, busybee,penniless, etc., my thoughts are with you guys (naks sa drama ampoohtek!). Hindi madaling mapag-iwanan and i guess that's gotta be one of the worst feelings in the world. But then, we all have our reasons, so are you. So, adding to the fact that my thoughts are with you nga (haha!),my sympathies (tama ba spelling ko?!) are of course, with you!Syempre, mga kaibigan ko kayo at mahal ko kayo kahit na hindi ko na memorize mga schedule nyo at wala na kong track of records ng latest crushes and kalokohans nyo. :)

So, sa lahat ng dumaranas ng paghihirap maging ito man ay tungkol sa exams, papers, meeting deadlines, lovelifes, thesis, pimples, dementia, families, mean girls, mean boys, friendships, foodies, body system, celestial impacts or world peace...si mariela ay si mariela. one text/email/call away lang. do remember that. As for my perpetual absence in almost everything, you can do the deductions (cos i'm no way good at it!) And oh, i still love Ping Medina. He's the closest thing that i could picture beside the word adoration. Tsktsk. Talk about dementia.