Saturday, May 27, 2006

the art of dealing

When Hannee told me a few weeks earlier that " May, ang payat mo na!", i somehow thought that it really couldn't be that bad. But after hearing remarks such as "Dude, ang payat mo na!" and "Ate Marye, bakit ang payat mo na?", well, it must have been bad after all. But the greatest (or meanest) blow I dare not imagine would come from my Geography teacher. He asked me (with his unique singsong pronounciation of my name pa kamo) "Marye, bakit ang payat mo na? Nag-aadik ka ba?". Whoa. Kumusta naman yon di ba? I must have been going down the drain faster than I thought I'm supposed to be going. I made a mental note to weigh myself if I ever get the chance. The probabilities are quite strong that my usual 43 kgs have also declined.

Although I'm going through these things every friggin' day, sometimes, what one can do is to find the perks of such new found path in life (even if you insist there's none!). Come to think of it, a month ago, I probably would have died with the thought of having no meals in between, nowadays, I'm grateful enough to have a full lunch and dinner. I haven't drank any softdrinks (until 3 days ago when an orgmate bought me a sakto) for sometime now, eaten any junk foods (save from few occasions that friends are actually eating one) nor sweets (even a single chocnut I manage to avoid) and of course, the fast foods.The urges often do come, but like what Ate used to say, "it's just an urge!" Mababaw it may seem, but real. It's just a matter of fighting the temptations and having a tight budget.

But beyond all these "worldly desires" (nyak!), there are things that are far more important than just dreaming of the much-desired mcdo meal! My friends, if ever I made a promise to any one of you to not shed too much tears anymore (i forgot specifically to whom e), well, I am so sorry. haha! I cry not becasue i am always sad or in the verge of breaking down but simply because I'm just mighty happy for having been this far. My heart swells with all the kindness everybody's been giving me (naks, pero pwera biro). I guess in times like these, all we'll ever gonna need are some right people with all the right purpose. When Hannee took me out that one wonderful Sunday, sobrang masaya na talaga ko nun, pero syempre hindi papayag yun ng ganun lang. :) Si Pam, na pinagbabaon pa ko ng lunch (straight from Bulacan pa) after a draining day of numbers and formulas.Heartwarming di ba? When a friend’s father texted me from abroad telling me that “I’m like another daughter to him..”, pakshet, gusto kong ipanganak uli right there and then. For Ate Grace, whom I need not elaborate more for it’ll take too much space and time. Basta, I dedicate my Math 11 and fieldwork grades to you. Yung manong Ikot driver who willingly took my 4 pesos fare because I found out wala na pala kong pera. Ito siguro yung isa sa mga moments na di ko makakalimutan. Dahil na rin siguro sa hiya at tuwa di ko na napigilang umiyak. Kamusta uli! Si kimi. Ang kaibigan kong tatahi-tahimik at napaka-kuripot pero big hearted talaga inside. My constant ear lender kahit alam kong minsan nakakasawa na din. Life’s really full of surprises ika nga. Si izay, kahit na bihira pa kaming magkita. Parang Priory of Sion lang yan e, kahit di mo pa makita, the wheels are always in motion . Si Juraine, ang batang nagdala sakin sa Baguio. Kapag kasama mo si Juraine, never kang magugutom! Sa mga constant support ng iba ko pang mga kaibigan. Si Sarah, na sasagot daw ng future grad shoes ko, hehe, si Ela na karamay ko nung nireject kami that one gloomy Tuesday, kay Raymond, Ed, Len, June, Es, Tel, Rain, Popsie (kahit bihira tayong magkita at 2 beses mo na kong iniindyan!), Pol, blockmate Weng.

Parang gumagawa ko ng speech of thanks no? Or parang last testament (wala kasing will e).Hmm..creepy pala ito. But the bottom line is hindi ko nakakalimutan at makakalimutan lahat ng mga taong tumulong at tumutulong sa akin during these dark days. Maswerte pa rin ako even with less pounds off of me. Kahit na hindi ko na matutunang hindi umiyak tuwing naririnig ko ang Helena at Breakaway for some strange unknown reasons, okey lang talaga. Siguro nga bobo ko sa conversational English (kaya ko nireject haha!) at matatagalan pa kong maging lover ang sine ,cosine, tangent, exponential functions, derivatives at limits, pero one day soon it’s gonna happen to you..I mean, someday, somehow, I’ll also gonna see the light every proud graduates have seen in their time. Amen.

No comments: