Friday, December 19, 2008

of farewells and deathly silence

Admittedly, I am not good with goodbyes and faretheewells. Hey, it may not really show most of the time but my alter ego succumbs into it nonetheless. But I have to say, that today's goodbyes and farewells didn't bother me much. Why? I'm not exactly sure either. Maybe because I don't feel alone anymore, maybe because I have other friends and almost family to hang onto each time someone leaves or maybe because I know that it wouldn't be a permanent goodbye. There's always the thought that they'll come back, no matter how long it may take.

Whenever my grandmother and I have fights or if I did something she didn't like, she'd give me the silent treatment. She's not the type to hit a kid, she might give me some awfully long sermons and that's that but she'd still ignore me for some time. And it kills me. That was about the same time when I learn how to deal with being alone, burying my nose under tons of books and writing wrong-grammared entries on my dog-eared journals. See, I can be very sociable and friendly and all but I highly regard my solitary moments too, it doesn't last that long though bummer.

That's why I dont like these long silent seconds, minutes, hours. I'd rather you scream and shout at me than endure those long deathly silence. Or I can always just walk away. But I suck at it. So either way...


atticus said...

i have long learned that my character flaw is that when i don't yell at the person who irritated me, the silence can be long and permanent.

kaya i yell na lang. but sometimes i still find myself silent, and i lose friends that way.

merry christmas. here's to friends and relatives that should get an earful.

Marye said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Marye said...

whoa! The great writer commented on my blog! I am so honored and shocked. Salamat miss JJ! Bistado ako hehe.